The renewal of my life cycle is the most important day of the year for me. I tend to surround myself with friends and feast with various forms of entertainment. I start planning in December. Many people informed me that they were attending. However, little did I know that it was not true.
One by one cancelations started streaming in within an hour of the dinner. At least some people informed me that they were not coming. Others did not even say anything to me. They simply did not show. There I sat for thirty minutes awaiting company that never manifested. The lovely chairs looked back at me with their emptiness. One friend appeared. She was the only one that kept me company all for a while.
After the sub standard meal, I went home and became a puddle on my floor. Alone. In the darkness. I did not want to be alone on my birthday. Yet, there I was. It was a cold reminder that my importance was secondary yet again. I was thankful for the text messages, fb love, and phone calls. A card even came in the mail. The tears have yet to dry from my wet face as I try to nurse myself back to a rational state. It was the worst birthday of my life.