Being Unhappy

How many times have you heard a friend, sister, aunt, or even yourself…complain about how unhappy she is in her relationship. These are some common phrases: I want a divorce; I have invested the best years of my life to this relationship with nothing to show for it; Who would want me now. However, when the opportunity presents itself for her to change her situation, she does not. She chooses to stay and wallow in her unhappiness. Why? Why does she complain, cry, and bemoan her doorless cage?
My only conclusion is that it is easier to remain miserable. True change requires extreme effort. Genuine work has to take place. It is a rare individual indeed that can look at her life and say no. My story does not continue like this. It requires less effort to make excuses that at some point you actually believe to placate the very thing that breaks your heart over and over again. There are side affects to making such changes. For one thing, the true colors of those that are around you are shown.
When you are unhappy, you radiate at a lower vibration. This makes many people comfortable around you because they have company to complain with. There is another body at the bar. There is a permanent friend to face the struggles of life. However, if you decide that an unhappy relationship is no longer for you, there is more than leaving that person. You may not have as much in common with your former drinking buddies. The drunken Happy Hour calls cease because you have to get to yoga. Instead of complaining, perhaps you have sought the assistance of a therapist who helps you understand why you chose this person to begin with. This leaves you with little to share with people that were once held captive by your tales of woe. The fried food that once kept you locked in high blood pressure has vanished in favor of live food and lemon water.
This can be shocking to friends and family alike. You begin to thrive and your vibration rises. Some people will be tickled pink about all of the sunshine in your life. You have chosen to break free from your chains and truly live. Others will despise and attack you. “Who does she think she is, living her best life…”. There may be arguments and other break ups. Why? If you found your sunshine, your light now shines too bright into the darkness of your former mates. They resent you for leaving them behind in their bitterness.
There is a lesson to be learned from all sides with such a situation. When you have an individual in your life that wants to be crestfallen for eternity, it is your responsibility to let them. If you choose to stick around and listen to the tales of woe, make certain that you are doing something to uplift yourself once all of that energy has pierced your bubble. If you are the one that wants to be happy, the first step is hope. The first step is to know for a fact that change has to happen. Once you make that decision, the entire universe will conspire to help you. Lawyers appear. Someone suggests a boom from Oprah’s list. You win a retreat that shows you a whole new world.
If you are the unhappy one that wants to remain in the mud, someone will be present to listen to you. Once your old friends get tired of it, new ones tend to appear and sympathize with you. There will always be company for your misery. The rest of us are here silently hoping that you choose a better life for yourself. However, we are also out here living our own. Choose wisely. Choose happiness.