FEELINGS

When it rains, I become extremely unhappy as if I could cry myself. Its even worse if it is late at night. This is something that I realized earlier this year. However, it was during a random discussion with my mom that I found out that I have always had this quirk. I dicussed it with an astrologer and she determined that the change in temperature affects me especially because of my sign thus, I feel lonely.

When I perform for long periods at a time far away from home…the loneliness increases. Last night had all of the above mixed into one big fat recipe. As I walked back and forth to my performance site, there was a large pool area next to a jacuzzi. Each time that I would pass, I would stop and just look at the wonderul scene of it all overlooking the beach. The intoxicating spa music just took everything over the top. I envisioned myself there with my friends just enjoying the healing wonderment of it all. This is why I work hard. Life is about balance. I decided that I would research a way to have a time of this nature perhaps for my birthday.

In the meantime, I also have to create a game plan to follow for those rainy days that just put me in the doldrums. Sometimes, I think that I need a dog and then I remember…I do not want children.