Being single in the middle of a pandemic is the loneliest place in the world.  Friends are off limits, and there is no one to spend time with.  At some point, zoom fatigue sets in and you just can’t attend one more virtual event.  The world is more open now and life appears to be close to whatever normal means.  While there are more people available for sheer socialization purposes, going home to an empty house on a daily basis is dismal.  The end of a gathering is an anxiety spike.  The sound of silence is not always comforting.  How does she do it?

Walking helps.  I walk whenever possible.  It helps me sleep, gets me out of the house, and maintains my weight.  Dunkin Donuts sees me a lot for breakfast.  Why?  It gets me out of the house.  Yes, I could buy my own breakfast goods from Publix so that I can make them myself.  However, lunch and dinner are at home thanks to the new air fryer.  Breakfast is another excuse to be around people without being too close for them.  Contactless ordering is life.

My ex reached out to me this week.  It does not surprise me.  She appeared in a dream the night before.  It is impossible to entertain your future and your past at the same time.  I need a wife in my life.  She was not up for the honor.  It is in my best interest to keep it moving.  I just can’t imagine that God would want me to be alone for the better part of my life.  When does it end?