THE INFAMOUS HURRY UP LIST

This dreaded list gets emphasized during this time of year. It could be that people look for conversation pieces in an effort to talk to one another at the fattening dining table; however, the best of intentions often cause the worst of pains..Let us begin.

1.)IF YOU ARE SINGLE…”WHEN ARE YOU GOING TO START DATING?” There are reasons why an individual may be single.

*Recent Breakup- A wise person would not jump into a serious relationship after ending one. A time of healing and readjustment needs to happen. A new relationship would simply build upon the baggage of the previous one and simply lead to more pain and heartache.

*DATING POOL- Many people who ask when are you going to start dating are actually unaware of the dating scene. It is not that easy to meet someone. Don’t believe me? Have you ever been able to have a serious conversation with someone in a club? Why are there so many online dating sites? There are matchmakers a foot as well that command a pretty penny for the opportunity of marriage. What if you are looking for a particular type of person that you simply have not seen and you prefer to wait?

*Spiritual Reasons- Sometimes, an individual is going through a spiritual awakening and does not need the added responsibility and pressures that a relationship can bring to the table. When on the quest to develop yourself on such a level, isolation is often a part of the equation. Sometimes, friends have to be removed as well because it is discovered that they were not friends to begin with.

2.) IF YOU ARE DATING…”WHEN ARE YOU GOING TO GET MARRIED?”
*Marriage is an institution that is recognized by god and the law. People are not bound in their own beliefs to recognize marriage as a legitimate goal.

*Divorces run rampant in this day and age. One has a lot to consider before considering an engagement and being tied to this individual for an entire lifetime…until death us do part. That is a serious piece of pie….

*Marriage may not be an option.

*When you are asked this question, does that person want to be married or simply attend a wedding?

2A.) IF YOU ARE DATING AND LIVING TOGETHER…”WHEN ARE YOU GOING TO GET MARRIED AND STOP LIVING IN SIN?”

*Please define the word sin. If you do have a definition, enlighten the rest of us that do not use this term.

*Is there a race of some sort to beat the clock? Tick tock tick….
*What if you just want to share a space with the person whom you love? Is this a crime of some sort?

3.) IF YOU ARE MARRIED…”WHEN ARE YOU GOING TO HAVE A BABY?”
*Not every couple chooses to have a baby. They do have a right to be together without a child being a part of the package.

*Many couples choose to enjoy each other and develop as a couple for a long period of time prior to considering parenthood.

*Some couples are unable to conceive and may not want to participate in such conversation.

*How do you know that this couple hasn’t miscarried but desperately wants a child?

4.) IF YOU ARE MARRIED WITH A BABY…”HAVE YOU GIVEN ANY THOUGHT TO ANOTHER CHILD?”
*No, but have you given any thought to the fact that you are on your third piece of pie and your gym membership just expired?

*Yes, but unless you move out, we won’t be able to afford one.
*We did not want the first one but we consider it a blessing!
*No. We have decided that we want tons of dalmations instead…101 to be exact. Perhaps you can dog sit the next time we fly to the South of France….

THANKSGIVING: AN IRRESPONSIBLE PRESENCE

Another day of gobbling fits has rolled around. The airports have been clogged with people traveling to their family homes for this popular holiday. Retailers are armed and ready to welcome the masses for shopping bouts of sheer frenzy, and turkeys everywhere can finally breathe a sigh of relief. For now. This year, my heart has a bit of emptiness in it.

As I watch people gather together to eat, I wonder about the people that have no one to gather with. How do they feel watching families come together for rejoicing? I know one woman that lost her husband the day before Thanksgiving last year. There is a family that is mourning the shooting of their young teenage daughter in my city. Others yet are estranged from their families due to their choice of lifestyle. Why, I just read about a family that was evicted because the landlord squandered their rent money instead of paying the mortgage. While I prepare to facilitate the Circle on the Beaver Moon, we will be discussing being thankful and gratitude; however, what about the people that do not get a moment to look towards the heavens to say thank you?

There is of course the scapegoat defense that arises during this time of year. People feel the need to eat beyond the normal constraints of a human stomach. Have they forgotten how long leftovers last? The restaurants will be packed by tomorrow evening because turkey will be a tired taste by then: turkey sandwich, turkey soup, turkey and rice……sigh. Damn the turkey.
You will hear, “Oh, I will start my workout right after the holidays in the New Year”….Tell me, how many New Year’s Resolutions are actually kept? Fitness and nutrition are not seasonal trends that can be bent this way and that. They require dedication on a daily basis. If a person is truly dedicated to their own upkeep, they will not be seen at the dinner table piling on ridiculous amounts of food.

Let us touch on the amount of conflict that arises during large holiday gatherings. Most adults live a good distance away from their parents. However, once in close quarters, many mothers feel the need to resume their once very dominant position and begin to impose rules and regulations that have no place in the plate of a grown adult. There may be new mates at the table that are not liked by anyone except for the significant other and often with good reason. There is always the abandoned drunken uncle that no one will claim. What if he begins to spew secrets about the family that cause deep pain? The holiday season is not as pleasant for everyone as the media would have us believe.

I would also like to make the Hurry Up List. What is the Hurry Up List?…..
HURRY UP LIST
1.)IF YOU ARE SINGLE…”WHEN ARE YOU GOING TO START DATING?”
2.) IF YOU ARE DATING…”WHEN ARE YOU GOING TO GET MARRIED?”
2A.) IF YOU ARE DATING AND LIVING TOGETHER…”WHEN ARE YOU GOING TO GET MARRIED AND STOP LIVING IN SIN?”
3.) IF YOU ARE MARRIED…”WHEN ARE YOU GOING TO HAVE A BABY?”
4.) IF YOU ARE MARRIED WITH A BABY…”HAVE YOU GIVEN ANY THOUGHT TO ANOTHER CHILD?”
5.) IF YOU ARE WELL SEASONED AND WORKING…”WELL, WHEN DO YOU PLAN TO RETIRE?”

I will address this list in further detail in another post….

HOW I PLAN TO SPEND MY DAY
This holiday normally sees me on a stage somewhere far away performing for hours and a time. I often feel quite lonely until I return home and begin my journey to my family residence. By the time I normally arrive, the gathering has dwindled and I can get to the food without any lines or waiting. Fortunately, my parents recognize this as a career standard and happily welcome me late. When I am not performing on turkey day, I make the rounds to the places of invitation and finally roll around to my final destination of my parents. Today will be a different Thanksgiving for me.

Today, I have begun with blogging and a cup of moon tea. It shall be followed by meditation with a crystal quarts on into stretching, working out, and will be rounded with a nice hot bath to soothe my body. I expect to begin my journey early in the afternoon for the early dinner. The thoughts of the lonely still creep in my mind and perhaps, I should light a candle for them. When this day is over, I shall sleep soundly. Happy Thanksgiving!