Coping

1.) Blogging: Writing about my experiences really helps me get to the bottom of my feelings while allowing my friends a chance to connect with me. It avoids alienation and enhances the human experience. While I have been around a lot of people for longer periods of time, I am still introverted and need a minute. As an empathic medium, I often have problems taking on the emotions of others during such times. If I talk about what is happening to me, everyone can see that I am ok and the uncomfortable mystery is no more.

2.) Prayer: This has been a huge part of every day. I pray everywhere. I have been to chapels and churches. If my mind is unable to formulate anything, then I simply present myself. I have requested that everyone pray for me and my family. My father’s name has been added to prayers in various languages, and friends in other countries have also reached out to me. Having a blanket of 24hr prayer surrounding me makes me feel extremely supported.

My guardian angel & spirit guides have been as close as they can possibly be during this time. My spiritual encounters are very strong these days as my father has already let me know that he is still with me. I also seek the comfort of the archangel of grief, Azrael; however, I can say that I am not sad. Often times, there is a smile on my face.

3.) Flowers: My home has been filled with beautiful flowers and fragrant candles. In nine days, I shall create a special place of honor for my father so that I can pay homage to him daily as I pray. This date has already been marked in my calendar, and I am looking forward to it.

4.) Sisterhood: Friends have reached out to schedule lunch dates or anything just to keep me active. People came over to offer their condolences and to help me celebrate the transition of my dad. This was important because while the sisterhood was taking place for my mother, it wasn’t happening for me as long as I was at her home(distance). It was nice to have it for myself in my own sanctuary. As the solstice approaches, I hope to be able to run free on the beach with flowers on my person.

5.) Music: I planned every detail of the music for the viewing, funeral, burial, and repast. It brought me a great deal of joy to do so. The execution of it all was rather moving for us the performers as well as for the people that attended.
Viewing: solo harp
Final Viewing: solo harp
service: flute/viola/cello/harp two vocalists pianist/organist
Burial: Violin/Cello
Repast: Guitar

Cds have been made for me as well as certain songs that I listen to a lot. It really makes me feel so very nice. I am happy to have music at my side.

6.) Sensual: I enjoy sensual things. The sun was out today. It shone rather brightly on the earth. I found myself wanting to wander around so that its warmth could grace my skin. Birds often chirp a beautiful song which reaches my ears. While I took a hot shower, I realized that I enjoyed it so much that I decided to turn it into a hot bath with bubbles. Instead of my normal 1hr massage, I had one for 1.2hrs and it was a requirement. Reiki will be added to the mix on a more frequent basis so that my energies remain leveled.

7.) Awareness: Since I have dealt with grief before, I knew what to expect as far as my own behavior possibly changing. I knew that I would be afraid of the dark. It did not last as long this time as I can already sleep without lamps. Peace and quiet are not always welcomed right now. My appetite has improved a great deal since my father left the nursing home. Supplements and the drinking of water are also rebalancing.

Piscean Power

My life has suddenly changed its pace. My phone has been ringing off the hook with email notifications fighting for attention. Appointments are appearing faster than what I am aware of and yet the sun is still shining. It is due to the impending doom of work which greets me next week. However, I have learned that I am a person that likes a nice slow easy pace. Entire days that are dedicated to absolutely nothing suit my just fine. My schedule was so overwhelming this last Spring that I escaped on vacation with a friend. She told me that she was leaving town on official business, and I told her that she had company. Am I complaining? No. This is simply a voice of concern for my future sanity.
I have a fondness for telling my sisters that they should consider themselves prior to anyone else. Put yourself in a seat of honor so that you can continue to serve the ones that you love. Here is yet another situation on my hands where I need to consider myself prior to the insane madness that my life is going to throw at me. Gone are the days of awaking around 11 and moving after noon. No more midday chats with my beloved sister as we sing of the days of glory. How shall I cope? I need a game plan.
Silence. I am a reclusive Piscean that likes silence. I do not fancy a lot of noise around me because it is irritating. More often than not the lights must be off if I want to concentrate. Soft beautiful music lulls me to sleep. Pedicures make me feet feel amazing and there is a new group of women that will be gathering in the name of one of my favorite goddesses. Maybe, I shall join them for the fun. Part of how I plan to conquer this predicament is being prepared for it. Since I know that the transition back to work will be the opening of flood gates, no matter how I try to put it in a more pleasing light, its rough on me. It is up to me to draw upon the available resources to keep myself in tact. That and I already have a retreat planned for September.

CONNECTING

There are subtle energies that exist in the world that we as women can tap into. If we are busy, filled with toxins, or stressed, they are very easy to miss. Such energies can often heal us of worry and assist with physical ailments. We have to take the time to bond with them so that they can keep us refrehsed and open for life to evolve.

Solitude gives us a chance to stop and think without distractions. It enhances your crown chakra. You can get in touch with your own voice without the interference of other influences that would normally drown it out. Just practising an “existence” in combination with a meditation practice can be quite beneficial when understanding how to listen to the guidance that the universe has to offer. Spend quality time away from social networking and other people in order to fully grasp these benefits. If you meditate in a group, consider adding your own meditation to that as well. You may find that the various experiences take you to different places and ultimately give you different answers. You may even connect with various light beings with these approaches. Explore your route and find out what works best for you. That is the menu that you are to follow. The combination of prayer and meditation can also work wonders.

Many women complain that they wish that they had more time to dedicate to themselves but that there isn’t enough time in the day. How is it possible that we as natural receivers give away too much of ourselves and then have nothing left? You schedule time to go get your nails done. You find time to eat. Schedule an appointment with yourself on a regular basis in order to accomplish those little things that you know will ground you. When you are ready to spend time with yourself, disregard the clock as you are your own priority. Others will respect your time and space if you begin to do the same. Living a life with a scattered brain will bring you scattered results.

This week in particular has brought the ever popular, “I am upset because I have eaten everything…”. Remember that we are humans. Women in particular are affected by various cycles including our favorite menstration. Your mind and body will react differently during these cycles and may demand different things. There is nothing wrong with falling off the horse for a little while and eating that dessert for a few days. However, if you stay off the horse and do not return to your exercise regimen or reintroduce greens in your diet, then the true defeat will begin. If you spend time at one extreme of the scale, take the time to balance it out by detoxing and truly watching what you put in your body. Your diet is a big part of your health and affects how you receive your messages and your thought process.

What about my feminine side? I have no time to devote to her. Of course you do! Instead of that treadmill this evening, why not try a Middle Eastern Dance class and unleash that goddess with ancient moves that were designed for your body by women. The natural moves will compliment what you already call your physical temple. Wake up a little earlier and play with your hair in the mirror. You planned on wearing black and white to that function? Why not add a dash of red to your outfit. You have flannel pajamas but do you have a silk teddy? There are many ways that you can work your girliness back into your life.

Creative outlets are another way of keeping that inner girl happy. When was the last time you painted something? You do not have to be Picasso to enjoy the feeling of a paintbrush on paper. If you enjoy reading affirmations, why not try writing some of your own to keep yourself inspired?
Attend the current opera or go to that restaurant that has a new jazz night. Why you could even be the newcomer at the spoken word night at the local lounge. There are so many resources for you to utilize those skills that you may have left behind in elective classes years ago. Allow them the pleasure of keeping you in touch with the expression of your own voice. Your sacral and throat chakras will say thank you.

Its Saturday night and the art walk is beginning in Wynwood. I can hear the cars on the street passing by as my fingers click away on the keyboard. I have ventured out today to wander about the world and shall use my evening to connect to myself and understand my own desires. My upcoming plans for classes excite me as I continue to develop, research, and share. The exercises from the last two circles are still in effect. My Moonflower is sprouting quite nicely with my balance intention, and my shell sits in my crystal grid as it reminds me of what I am working towards as far as a smaller intention. It brings me great joy to continue to improve and share with my sisters as all of us strive to be better women in a world that does not always welcome us. Take some time for yourself this evening and rejoice in the fact that you did something nice for yourself.