After reflecting upon my Friday evening, I realized something. Everything made sense to me. I suddenly understood how to mingle and meet people. Clubs, bars, large parties, are all environments that make me feel unsafe. There are too many people doing things that can cause serious problems. However, a place that honors my gender while celebrating art is where I feel safe. There isn’t any fear in walking up to someone and saying hello or I enjoyed what you did. It simply does not exist. The fear of judgement or isolation is gone. Such a place can be created by me or sought out by me. It is in this manner that I shall now proceed.
This post on Facebook really made me pause for a moment. The immediate question that came to mind was, where has being safe taken me? How has it advanced my life? I analyzed the situation.
Safe led me to college where I received a degree and began a job working for a system. There is a schedule, guidelines, demands, rules, and directives that I must follow in order to keep my job. I have to say that after many years of this routine, being safe is boring and doesn’t bring me to a place of passion. It is even being reflected in my dissatisfaction with my attire. My colorful personality should not be shelved during some parts of the day and then displayed during others. I want to be a fulltime centerpiece of bright color for the world to see and admire.
Safe led me to believe that my first serious boyfriend was going to be my husband. We would settle down and have a family. Fortunately, that was not the case. My path has allowed me to find myself and redefine my person time and time again. All of the changes that I have experinced have been for my personal progress, and I am thankful to do so without the constraints of a serious relationship or dependants that would have to be my main focus. Instead, my focus is what I want it to be.
Being safe now leads me to another type of thinking. I do not put all of my stock in a Western doctor because a quick fix is not the answer for a body that I have to keep for a long life. It is important for me to exercise if I want to stay healthy; that is a safe initiative. Keeping tabs on my stress factors and factoring fun into the equation is safe because it helps balance me. Studying astrology and working with angels are safe pursuits for me because the knowledge helps me deal with life. So, the new question is, if such things are safe, what is considered throwing caution to the wind?
Yesterday, I bought two new items of clothing. One item was a pair of abbreviated shorts. This is not safe for me because it is very much out of my element to wear something of this nature. It will no doubt be a conversation piece once I step out of the door.
I dream of transitioning into a career that is better suited to my journey in this lifetime. A career that allows me to feel effective and passionate about what I do is at the top of my list. Because I have the audacity to think that this is possible for me to accomplish, I would say that this is yet another example of throwing caution to the wind for me because I am no longer able to accept the norm as being my happiness. I want something else. I want more for my life.
Perhaps what is happening here is that I am taking these so called terms(safe, caution) and redefining them as they apply to me. I challenge you the reader to take these terms and apply them to your life. Are you being safe? Are you throwing caution to the wind? Only you can determine this:)