Clueless

We had seen a each other a few times. It was not anything that was going to change life but just time spent with another human being. The term boyfriend came up during a phone conversation one evening. He had a fit. I was quickly told that this was not a serious relationship and that he did not want there to be any misunderstandings. His words struck a chord with me and sent my mind into a deep pensive state.
I was very aware of the fact that this was not a serious relationship; however, the swiftness in which it was relayed to me was startling. The time that we did spend together was always cut short by a party that suddenly interrupted my Friday night. I was under the impression that Friday evenings were spent in social arenas. If you were seeing someone, the two of you entered such arenas together. That was not the case. Imagine planning to spend an evening with someone. You arrive. Perhaps a meal is shared. You settle in for the evening…only to hear, “I am going to a party tonight. What are you doing?”
Instead of investing any more time with such endeavors, I chose to inform this individual that since we were not girlfriend and boyfriend, perhaps we should act more like friends. My visits stopped. The calls vanished. Any form of communication on my part evaporated as I looked into other avenues of social developed along the lines of dating. It was not too long after this that strange phone calls in the middle of the night began.
It was late one Friday night. My phone rang with an unrecognizable number. I answered only to hear, “Do you miss me?”. My response indicated that I did not know whom was speaking. He seemed a bit confused that my expression did not even recognize his existence. Another few weeks went by. The phone rang again. “I just returned from a cruise to the Bahamas. I do not know why I kept thinking about you.” Hmmm……why didn’t you think about me prior to going on the cruise?
This is how people without an aim in life can deter your desires. I wanted a boyfriend but this individual wanted a friend that happened to be a woman. Once this was clear to me I moved on. Unfortunately for him, he still clinged to the notion that the illusion in his head was all I could possibly want. He soon impregnated another woman and married her. I am happy that it was not me.

SCANDAL VS. TEMPTATION : OLIVA & JUDITH

The Scandal hysteria has been all over Facebook for a while now. Television doesn’t exist in my living space; however, in an effort to better understand the world around me and perhaps find some inspiration for my current lack of direction, I decided to watch a few episodes on the website. While I don’t quite see the need for the massive chaos as yet, there were some other things that I did observe.

Oliva Pope is the lead charcter played by a beautiful Kerry Washington. Her employees are her friends, the cell phone is her dictator, and those big eyes seem to mist whenever the topic of the president arises; A man with whom she engaged in an affair with. Everything about this powerful individual is geared by her determination to succeed in a cut throat industry. Where are her friends outside of the office? Will she be able to engage in a relationship with an individual that is actually available? There is so much more in the future for this woman, and I look forward to watching her develop. While watching her in action, I could not help but think about another beautiful woman that engaged in an affair and got more than what she bargained.

It was a few weeks ago when I drove to a local movie theater to watch Tyler Perry’s Temptation. It had been quite some time since I had watched a movie and was excited to have a nice bag of popcorn to keep me company. I immediately felt pulled into the story as I identified with many of the feelings that Judith experienced. In the end, she destroyed something good in the pursuit of something better and was left with nothing. Her husband divorced her and married another woman; the son was handsome. The man with whom she cheated beat her senseless and gave her AIDS. There was a lack of communication which ultimately assisted in her demise. The movie left me in a sobbing heaping mass as the raindrops plummeted my car like bullets.

Every woman that I know wants to be loved by another human being in a romantic way. Unfortunately, too many of my sisters settle for situations that are less than what they deserve. They pay money to fly across the country to be with a man that doesn’t want to be with them. They make excuses for the fact that he was busy with work for the last seven days in a row. All of this for the reward of saying that there is a creature with a penis in my life. Congratulations.

The president wanted to leave his office and his wife for Olivia. She told him no. She had to stay with her people. She didn’t want him to give up the presidency for her. I wonder what relationship she could have had if she had been with an available man. Judith had a loving husband that became comfortable and took her for granted. He did not know that she wanted to experience new things. He did not know that she wanted a knight in shining armor if only for one night. When she told him that he was not the spectacular man that she wanted, his tears of pain were real. She shared such information is such a cold manner;however, it was entirely too late. She was involved with another man long before she was in copulation with him. Her relationship began there. She did not have any friends either besides her frenemy in Kim Kardashian. That is another topic for another post.

Both of these women are classic examples of women that we know. They wanted something that they were unable to get from men. They had everything to offer on the table: talent, drive, beauty, intelligence….but did they truly understand what they wanted? Did they ever give themselves the opportunity to fully understand what it was that they truly wanted for themselves? I ask all of these questions based on ficitonal stories. Yes, that seems funny; however, these stories are not that far fetched from real life.